Monday, December 22, 2008

Thoughts, the week of Christmas

Its funny, Matt and I are going to spend our first and last Christmas this year as just the two of us. No family, no kids, just us. I'm excited and sad. Its weird knowing that all of my family has gathered in Houston and to not be with them but at the same time, I'm excited to share the day only with Matt. I hope it all goes well and that the few gifts I got him arrive before Christmas (I was very late ordering so it will be my own fault if they don't). With the baby coming and the new house, we don't plan on having gifts under the tree or anything spectacular and for the first time, since before I started working at 16, I don't have amazing gifts for my family and friends. We sent out cards and I'm in the middle of making a few things but overall I'm just not prepared for the gift giving part of Christmas. I hope everyone isn't disappointed in me because of it.

That being said, I'm excited for Christmas for the first time since Mom died. I am listening to the music and rejoicing in the season. I think a lot of that has to do with the small one I am growing in my belly. At mass on Sundays the message goes straight into my heart and soul and I feel such a bond with Mary. In fact it seems weird that our baby isn't coming on Christmas day but a few weeks later instead. I just feel ready and expectant, I hope the baby isn't too late :)

I'm scared of the birthing part and the pain but I know that Matt and I are blessed and I can't wait to see Matt as a dad...he will be great at it.

Peace and joy this week of Christmas